Two Weeks (plus 1 day!)

A day late on this one! My mom and Nick left today so I was trying to soak up as much time as possible with them yesterday and made peace with my lack of posting on time.


Week two has been much better than week one...and week one wasn't even bad! Cassidy and I are more confident in our skills and don't worry as much about accidentally killing the baby. I am not yet totally comfortable leaving her to sleep in a room on her own for naps (bedtime in her own room is at least a month away). I like to periodically look at her to make sure she is breathing and that is hard to do when she is all the way upstairs. I have heard this gets better, but until then Noelle is pretty much stuck with me.

Noelle also had her first real bath and she seemed to like it. If she is anything like her mother, she will soon love bath time! She also had a perfect two week checkup - she has grown an inch since birth and is up to 8 pounds, 2 ounces! The weight gain was not a shock. Noelle is quite the eater and at times she goes from sleeping to "FEED ME NOW!" in about 2 seconds flat. Other times she has a 5 minute stretching/yawning routine that is absolutely hysterical. She has mastered following things with her eyes and really loves to look at the Christmas tree lights, TV, and people's faces (especially mama's!).


As for me, I am doing really well. I am back to feeling 100% and actually have a lot of energy sans napping. As for the baby weight - I gained 45 pounds total and have lost 25 so far. I am pretty happy with progress and know that things will happen quicker once the goodies that my mom has stashed in the house are gone! I was lucky not to have suffered from the "baby blues" but as of today am a bit down because my mom has left. It's not only the help I will miss, but just her company. Something about having "mom" around always makes things better and brighter and it is hard with her living so far away and not knowing when we will next see her.

Can't wait to see what week three has in store for us!

One Week

One week ago, on December 1st at 3:50 am, Ms. Noelle Elizabeth made her entrance into this world. She weighed in at 7 pounds, 14 ounces and was 20 inches long. She was (and is) perfect.

To answer some of my own questions from my last blog - she does have lots of dark hair, she seems to have my nose and my eyes (but it's hard to tell so early on), her cry is more of a high pitched screech that goes as quickly as it comes, I only shed a few happy tears when she was placed on my chest, and Cassidy stayed dry-eyed but the joy he felt was a beautiful thing to witness.

I am going to do a separate blog about labor & delivery (not too detailed, promise). But here are pics of us holding our bundle after she was cleaned up. Unfortunately, there are no pictures of when I first saw and held her because we were so caught up in the moment that the camera didn't even come out.




Noelle has been an absolute dream for us first time parents. She rarely cries or fusses and when she does, she typically just wants to be held. No problem for me considering I am adverse to sleeping at night because I miss her. No joke...I actually miss her when she is sleeping an arms length away. So many memories are forever ingrained in my mind already and I will treasure them always. One of my favorites is waking up in the hospital in my recovery room and seeing her being wheeled into the room, eyes wide open, with a little hat on, and my feeling of "I can't believe this perfect little person is mine." However, the best part is the love I feel for her. I've heard it said by others, but "love" doesn't really explain it. My heart leaps out of my chest with each new facial expression, coo, kick of her leg, and grasp of my finger. Breastfeeding, while exhausting, is such a special bond and I am so happy I made the decision to do it and that the two of us (Noelle & I) caught on within a few days.

I have to say that Cassidy has been the best support I could have asked for. He is up with me every time she is up - whether it is to get me water or chat with me to keep me awake, he runs errands, cooks, cleans, took the brunt of diaper duty, and tells me I am beautiful every day. It's so wonderful to watch him with her and see how much he loves her and cares for her. He is a protective papa bear and I'm nervous for the boys that come around in her teens :)

As for her 1 week birthday, we took some pictures today and as you will see, I captured a few of the many faces of Noelle...and they are all cute, if I do say so myself!

38 Weeks

Two more weeks. Two weeks until my life changes forever in ways I can't begin to imagine. I can't pretend to know what I will feel nor do I want to guess. I just know it is coming soon and that I will be forever changed and that my life will have a new purpose, meaning, and focus. My feelings now are difficult to put into words...but I'll try.

Mostly, I'm excited beyond comprehension. I'm excited to see her for the first time and to have some answers to questions we have been happily discussing - will she have hair (I think yes, and lots!), will she have my nose, Cassidy's eyes? Will she be big, small? What will her cry sound like? Will Cassidy cry when he sees his daughter? Will I stop crying? You get the idea...

There are also, as is expected, a lot of nerves about caring for her and wondering if we will do it "right". We've never cared for a baby before and until we took a parenting class, neither of us had ever changed a diaper! People say it will come to us, but I'm grateful that we will have both grandmas taking turns staying with us and helping out.

And the surprising emotion is one of sadness. And I'm not sure "sad" is the right word. The past couple weeks I have had moments of looking at Cassidy and our home and our life together so far. We have been so blessed to have seen so much together and to have been able to live and travel to such amazing places. We have had the luxury of being selfish with each other and our time and part of me is sad that we are going to lose that. I don't want this to sound like this feeling outweighs my happy feelings, b/c it doesn't come close. However, it sometimes pops up and it takes me by surprise every time.

Anyway, just wanted to get these thoughts down now. My next post may be my first as a mother :)

There's a baby room in our house!

Last weekend we finished Noelle's room and, if I do say so myself, it couldn't be any cuter! I had been holding off on finishing her room until the rest of our home was in good order - mainly that the guest room was finished in anticipation of the house guests we will have for the next few months. But finally last weekend I kicked it into gear and finished up.

I keep the door closed so the cats can't spend too much time in there. However, nearly every time I pass the room I go in the room and smile. While the room makes things more real, part of me still feels like we are playing house.







Everyone keeps asking - "Are you ready?". My response is always "as ready as we can be". I don't think there is any way that we can be totally ready for something that is so unknown to us. Are we ready to meet her and love her? - absolutely! Are we ready to be parents and all that comes with that? - we'll figure it out as we go along. We've taken the classes and read the books, but I don't think that can get us 100% there. My mom arrives on the 18th so she will help fill the gaps in our knowledge and preparedness.

I had my 36 week appt today and all is well. Noelle is head down, but I am not showing any signs of labor yet (aside from a few Braxton Hicks contractions). I think she will come within a few days of her due date so I think I have another 3-4 weeks to go! I need to get another picture in of the belly before then...

Santa Fe, A Wedding, & 30 Weeks

Two weekends ago Cassidy and I traveled to Santa Fe, NM for his sister's wedding. Neither of us had been to NW that we were aware of (possibly a drive through when we were young) and so we were looking forward to spending time in a new place. We also were very aware of the fact that it was our last trip together as a family of two and so took the time to really enjoy each other's company without distraction.

The wedding was a beautiful event on a hillside with the sunset as a backdrop followed by a lovely reception. Cass & I enjoyed spending time with his family and getting so many words of wisdom and advice about our newest addition. The love and attention from all the family was overwhelming at times, but much appreciated. Noelle is one loved little girl and she has so many people excited for her arrival. It's further amplified that she is the first of the next generation on both of our sides of the family.

Below are pictures of us from the rehearsal dinner and the wedding. I will have to get permission from the bride before I post her pictures here...but she looked absolutely stunning...I can tell you that much!

Moving, traveling, showering , etc.

That has been my past month and hence, my lack of blogs. Let's see...since the last post we have packed an apartment, moved to a bigger house (still in the city), traveled to CA for a little mini-vacation along with a baby shower thrown by my mother's wonderful friends, researched and purchased baby and guest room furniture, and looked for a new car (unsuccessfully, so far).

I know, not very exciting for a blog post. However, I do this blog mostly for me and I wanted to remember why I am such a slacker when it comes to posting when there is so much great stuff going on!

On the 9th I felt Noelle's hiccups for the first time. I was in the middle of a meeting and when I realized what was happening, it was very hard to contain my excitement and not ask my client's CFO to feel my belly! I refrained, it would have been akward for all parties involved :) We had our 28 week check up and I got in a sneak ultrasound b/c I happened to be the last appt of the day and my Dr. was in a fabulous mood and did it just for fun! She looked great and was doing her "practice breathing" while we watched her. Today Cass was home when the hiccups started and he could actually hear them when he had his ear on my belly!

Noelle's room is a disaster right now due to our sanding and refinishing of a dresser that Cass's grandfather made. After that is finished and aired out I will post pictures of the progress we are making.

Pictures to come of the belly and other stuff once I find my cord to load them. However, I can show this print, which I bought today for Noelle's room at the handmade fair in Wicker Park. I had been eyeing it on etsy for a while and when I saw it today I snatched it up!

Bliss

Warning: warm and fuzzy post coming up!

World, I am the happiest I have been in my entire life. It's due to a combination of several things, all of which revolve around my daughter, who is due in 16 short weeks!

Tonight, it hit me hard...in Target of all places...just how happy I really am. I was just wandering around with a fountain soda (yes, I still drink a Coke a few times a week) and aimlessly browsing the home aisles, storage, and the baby aisles and I literally got teary eyed. It is so strange, but I was just so happy in that moment and really allowed myself to revel in it. Revel in the fact that I have a wonderful family, amazing friends, a great job, a loving husband, and a daughter who likes to move around and kick at all hours of the day and remind me that she is there and she is thriving. (On a side note, as per usual, I walked out spending $100 on who knows what.)

Also, my happiness can be attributed to a re-prioritizing in my life. I am focused on the positive and all the little stuff that used to get to me, suddenly doesn't have a place. If I start getting stressed, it's easy to focus my attention on the more important things happening right now and realize that the other things are not worth my energy. It's wonderful to stop my churning mind and say "wait, does this really matter? Is it really worth upsetting yourself over?" It rarely is.

I laugh louder, hug longer, and love stronger now than I ever have, and I hope this is something that I can maintain for a long, long time.